Saturday, July 30, 2011

mother-daughter pedi

Because every lady needs some pampering before her first day back to work, or her fourth birthday, as the case may be. Purple with glitter? Yes, please!

Friday, July 29, 2011

a tribute to The Debut

Last night we attended our last performance of The Debut. The boys have grown into men and are moving away, building careers, and otherwise becoming adults. My ears are tingling and I'm feeling quite reminiscent. It was very bittersweet to watch them rocking on stage last night. This marks the end of an era.

When we moved to Minneapolis in 2005 we quickly became proper groupies. We were at all of the shows, brought along other friends, bought the albums and tee-shirts, and drank as much as possible, doing our part to make it profitable for the band. Before Sonia was born, The Debut was the exclamation point to our weeks. Life was good. We had a lot of fun - happy hours, late nights, shows. We met other bands and were, for a very short amount of time, part of the Minneapolis music scene. There were many nights spent standing outside The Hex, Turf Club and the infamous night at the Steak Knife. It was a whole lot of fun. Cheap beer, great music, and good friends.

When we were planning our wedding we managed to convince the band to play at our reception. They played our first dance song - Purple Rain - which was totally their suggestion, and totally awesome. We will go down in history as the only wedding The Debut ever played.

I remember standing at shows hugely pregnant with Sonia the summer she was born. We took Sonia to see The Debut play at Grand Old Days when she was a babe. Last summer, I was at a Debut show, when Stell asked me why I was drinking cranberry juice. Nine months later, Mila was born.

Watching the show last night made me feel old. Like, really old. It's one thing for me to be married, with not one, but two children. To be almost 30. But, The Debut is done? We really are old.

The music was great, the company was fabulous. The only thing missing was Vanessa and Luc, but they were there in spirit. Also missing was Tyler, of course, who was home with another sleeping babe.

Goodnight, Debut. We love you guys. We look forward to whatever lies ahead.

p.s. For those of you in town on August 13, you should check out the final show. They will be playing at the Nomad.

p.p.s. Sonia totally busted us last night. She was still awake when we snuck in at 1 a.m. She was angry we were out so late. I felt like a teenager being caught by my parents sneaking in after curfew.
crappy iphone photo

groupies - all grown up

Thursday, July 28, 2011

new (hipster geek) glasses

My new glasses came today - yay! There is nothing like a new accessory to make a girl feel better that she has to return to work on Monday. And, now, I can see, which is an added bonus.

My glasses are from my new fav, Warby Parker. I used the home try-on, so I chose five frames online and they sent them to me to try-on (obviously!). I am in heart with this company. Trying on frames in the comfort of my own home (and wardrobe) was one of the highlights of my summer, which is pretty big statement given the birth of my child, Sanj's graduation from law school, maternity leave, hanging with my homey, Sonia, et cetera.

I placed my try-on order on a Thursday evening and had five new toys to look at/play with by the following Tuesday. After five days I sent them back and received an email telling me I'm awesome. Once I ordered my frames (Preston in Whiskey Tortoise), I received my new frames with prescription lenses in a week. Yahoo!

Cross that one off my Thirty before 30.

Oh, and I forgot to mention the best part. All frames cost $95. Shipping is free. Now, go get yourself hipster geek!

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

just because

books, blogs and shoes

I used to read books. Many books. I spent hours wandering aimlessly through bookstores. I loved the smells and colors. I loved the quiet. I loved buying books, finding the perfect place on the bookshelf, loaning books out to friends and was always looking for recommendations. I spent hundreds of dollars buying books and hundreds more shipping them across the country (and the Atlantic!), as I moved back-and-forth to-and-from the east coast and Spain. Then one day, about two years ago, I decided it was all too much. I had too many books to take care of. Books that I didn't even necessarily love. And what is the point of keeping things just to keep them? I went through my books and made myself get rid of some. Many. I have gotten rid of bags and bags and bags of books over the past two years. My book collection is now contained within one relatively small bookshelf in the living room (two books deep) and my bedside table. Books are taken from the library or borrowed (and quickly returned) from family or friend.

To fill my thirst for reading, I mostly follow blogs. With small children in the house, my reading time is segmented into 5-20 minute intervals as I ride the bus, bathe a child, nurse a babe, et cetera. I also am an extremely nosy person, so blogs open the door for me to peek in upon the lives of others. I love to look around the homes of people. I love to look at their bookshelves, furniture, photos, and of course wardrobes, if ever given the opportunity. Off topic - how often do you notice people's shoes? If you aren't checking them out already, you should be. Not out of vanity, but pure curiosity. Shoes, books and blogs are, in my mind, the best way to really get to know a person.

I follow a number of blogs. I've become a bit of  a connoisseur and I'm quite picky about what I'll read. My blogroll includes a mix of art, design, travel, DIY, fashion, photography and children. People always ask me what blogs I read and I'm usually a bit timid about sharing, for fear that people will realize how unoriginal I am. But, there are so many great blogs out there that I figure it's only fair that I share. I've linked some of my favorite blogs in the sidebar. I'll rotate my list periodically. Enjoy!

What blogs do you love? Please leave a comment with your favorite blogs.

she rolls over!

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

finding balance

"I worked full-time for eight years and I'm pretty sure every single day during every single one of those eight years I'd have the thought "Am I doing the right thing here?" after kissing my daughters goodbye in the morning. I was so envious of other mothers who seemed to have such conviction in their choices--whether it was staying home or working in an office or something in the middle. I was never that mother. I always went back and forth and questioned my decision to work full-time."
Jenny Rosenstrach, food blogger, Dinner: A Love Story, on balancing. Via A Cup of Jo
With six days of maternity leave remaining, this sums up how I feel.  I want so badly to feel that I'm doing the right thing. I want to be certain it is for the best. I know I would regret leaving a position that I've fought hard for, but the thought of siting in an office, pumping, schlepping, faking it...


We journeyed up north for the second long weekend in a row to give Papa space to study for the Bar exam. The air is clear up there and the weather was perfect. It was a great way to spend my last couple of weeks of leave.

Little toes touching sand for the first time

Lots of swimming, despite an ear infection



Mumsie swims again!

Asleep in the car

Asleep in the car (at the same time!)

Taken by Sonia

Taken by Sonia



twelve weeks

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

on going back to work

In two weeks I return to work following a 12 week maternity leave, six of which were paid by my firm - a generous leave, by American standards. I'm lucky enough to be returning four days a week for the first few months. I'm also lucky to be leaving the girls with their grandparents (Mila) and beloved babysitter (Sonia) while I am at work. But, the thought of leaving at all is nearly unbearable, and it takes everything in my power to appreciate every single second of these last few weeks.

My friend, Sara, made the return-to-work journey a few weeks after Mila was born, when her own son was 12 weeks. She prepared me for this feeling. She said how hard it was to live "in the moment" in the weeks, days and hours leading up to the inevitable return to work. And she was right. Oh so terribly right. It is harder than I anticipated.

I'm not worried about Mila. I know she is in good hands. I know she'll take a bottle, she'll nap, she'll smile her sly little smile. I'm worried about me. I don't want to miss a second with these girls. I don't want to miss nursing Mila, and wearing her in the front pack and bouncing her to sleep and seeing her smile. I want to be the one to be there. She's been a part of me for almost an entire year and I'm not ready to leave her for nine hours a day. I don't want to return to the fast-pace life of a working mother. Rushing to get ready and out the door, rushing at work to pump, and to finish everything by the stroke of five so I can rush to pick up the girls and rush home to make dinner and rush into baths and bed and sleep. Rush, rush, rush. Entire weeks pass by that I can't even remember, which I guess is a blessing since I'm always rushing toward the weekend so we can slow down and enjoy life for a few moments before the rush starts all over again. All that rushing and one day you wake up and your kid is four and if it wasn't for the photos spanning the four years, you would swear it isn't possible.

I know that my return to work is the best thing for our family, but that doesn't make it any easier. I know that I'll get used to leaving Mila. And to be honest, there are some things I'm looking forward to. But I don't want this summer to end. I don't want August to come. I can't believe we live in a society that puts such a low value on parenting that parents are sent back to work with a pat on the back only a few weeks and/or months after a new baby is born.

I am so terribly heartbroken right now. I am so sad and angry and confused. I am not centered. I am not confident. I am not sure. I am trying my hardest to remain in the moment. To soak it all in. One day at a time.



Mumsie swims only once a year. 90 degree minimum. Today was the day. 

Sonia took this photo of Beau.

Happy campers.

Cousin Lil.

eleven weeks